Niagara Roller Girls

ToRD, GTAR Unite for 7th Annual Uhaul Brawl

Uhaul Brawl 15 BannerFor the third season in a row, Toronto’s annual Pride-affiliated all-queer all-star roller derby bout will be a cross-city affair, a collaborative effort between the city’s two biggest roller derby leagues, Toronto Roller Derby and the GTA Rollergirls but the history of the event has roots that shoot even further back. Although newly rebranded (more on that in the recap–stay tuned), this will be the 7th straight season that a Pride-affiliated roller derby game takes place as part of Toronto’s Pride celebrations and it remains an increasingly popular part of the week (the Torontoist listed it as one of the “15 Cheap Things to Do For Pride 2015”).

Circle City's Trudy Bauchery (skating for the Diggers) battles Montreal's Nameless Whorror and ToRD's Nasher the Smasher at the 2013 Clam Slam. (Photo by Greg Russell)

Circle City’s (Indianapolis) Trudy Bauchery battles Montreal’s Nameless Whorror and ToRD’s Nasher the Smasher at the 2013 Clam Slam. (Photo by Greg Russell)

Dating back to 2009 and held in ToRD’s former home at George Bell Arena in the city’s West End, the event formerly known as the Clam Slam was born. For the past five seasons, US skaters have been a big part of the event (some visiting skaters have included Rose City’s Mercy and Naptown’s Maiden Sane), and this year representatives from Buffalo’s Queen City Roller Girls will maintain the tradition, just one of twelve leagues that will have skaters represented in the two games.

Divided into four teams and two games, the first matchup will feature “intermediate-level” skaters playing a slightly shortened game featuring two twenty-minute halves. The second will be a full regulation game featuring slightly more advanced skaters (including members of the seven WFTDA-associated leagues, with Montreal, Toronto, Tri-City and Queen City all in Division 1).

The level of play in the past has been impressive to say the least: fast-paced hard hitting, the skaters not letting the all-star nature of the set-up detract from the competition and this year’s event should be no different.

Once again, for those out-of-towners who don’t want to miss the game (or miss seeing their leaguemates in action!), layer9.ca will be live-streaming both games (just to get warmed up, take a look back at the 2014 Clam Slam to get a sense of the level of play).  But there’s nothing like being there for the live event: tickets are available online or at select retailers.

Game Times and Roster (some skaters are skating under special names specifically for this event):

Game 1 (6:30 PM: Live Stream Link)

Blundstone Brigade The Glitterrazzi
132 Ca-thump! GTA Rollergirls
174 Poupée de sin, Poupée de sang Montreal Roller Derby
175 Simone De Beaver Montréal Roller Derby
3 Taboma Niagara Roller Girls
40 Flaming Hips Kingston Derby Girls
5309 Tits Inspecter Toronto Roller Derby
7 Xcalibur Tri-City Roller Derby
867 The Notorious V.A.G. (C) Toronto Roller Derby
8688 Dyke Spice Kingston Derby Girls
888 Tiny Beaver Montreal
9.75 Dykeosaur Durham Region
Et0h 2 y/o Drunk Toddler Toronto Roller Derby
M30W Devon Wrecks GTA Rollergirls
n00d Oliver Klozeoff ToRD
YE5 M.I.Gay Hammer City

BENCH: Devochka, Lowblow Palooza

084 Scream Queen Royal City Roller Girls
1000k VAGILLIONAIRE Toronto Roller Derby
246 Rubyfruit Rumble Toronto Roller Derby
2468 Malcuntent (C) Royal City Roller Girls
320 Bear Queen City Roller Girls
4pc NicNugget Queen City Roller Girls
63 Eaton Beaver Tri City Roller Derby
64 Two Spear-hit Toronto Roller Derby
6969 CAT the Conqueror Durham Region Roller Derby
72 Molly Malign Queen City Roller Girls
7435 Shakesqueer Toronto Roller Derby
83 Hot Fuzz Royal City Roller Girls
862 glitter snatch Toronto Roller Derby
99 Noodle Kaboodle Toronto Roller Derby
X3 Commander Box Toronto Roller Derby

BENCH: Coach Nail’er, Tits McGee

Game 2 (8:00 PM: Live Stream Link)

Plaid Mafia Team Uhaul
1 Gayly Copter Toronto Roller Derby
1000k VAGILLIONAIRE Toronto Roller Derby
1017 Clitty Smallz Toronto Roller Derby
12″ Jildo Toronto Roller Derby
1234 lous ur pants Toronto Roller Derby
1321 Queen LaQueefa (C) Tri City Roller Derby
15 The Littlest Homo Toronto Roller Derby
18 IGWE Toronto Roller Derby
25 Vause the Boss Toronto Roller Derby
313 Suzy SlamHer South Simcoe Rebel Rollers
51 Dana Scullcrusher Niagara Roller Girls
Full Dick Toronto Roller Derby
76 Getcha Kinks Toronto Roller Derby
828 Switch Hitter Royal City Roller Girls
911 Fraxxure Tri City Roller Derby

BENCH: Loose Knuckles, Jose Queervo

14 AnneX Tri City Roller Derby
1666 Sin Queen City Roller Girls
2 I HEART BUTTS Orangeville Roller Girls
21 Dyna Squirtcha Montreal Roller Derby
213 Sleeper Hold (C) Toronto Roller Derby
23 ThünderKünt Toronto Roller Derby
312 G-Stringer Toronto Roller Derby
519 Smashin’ Good Time Hammer City
52 SoFearMe GTA Rollergirls
55 Box Fairy Toronto Roller Derby
78 La Petite Mort Montreal Roller Derby
867 Gaycey McNally Toronto Roller Derby
917 Pepper Pot GTA Rollergirls
L7 Tara Part Toronto Roller Derby

BENCH: Genghis Khunt, Heavy Petter, Gayonce

** Doors at Ted Reeve Arena open at 6:00 PM. ToRD’s CN Power will be hosting the official after party at The Steady Cafe and Bar.

Peaches Does Roller Derby: The Clam Slam, WorldPride, and the Most Important Woman in the World

In which the Nerd reflects on the importance of WorldPride, the Clam Slam’s role within it, and how for a few days in September 2012, he was convinced that Peaches was the most important woman in the world.

The Clam Slam, this year a WorldPride Affiliate event, is in its 6th year.

The Clam Slam, this year a WorldPride Affiliate event, is in its 6th year.

As the giddiness of another Toronto Pride celebration begins to fade, the thrill of the event wears off, and it’s hard not to become reflective: on how inclusive and open a city we live, about how wonderful it is to celebrate diversity and difference and live in a place where those things are met with celebration instead if fear.

This year, the world came to our city to celebrate the first ever WorldPride held on North American soil. It meant an increased focus, increased participation, but it also meant an increased awareness of what life is like for members of the LGBTQITSLFA (LGBT) community outside of Canada. In turning our eyes to the struggles of those in places like Uganda, for example, we are able to see how lucky we are here.

Not, of course, to imply that the situation in Canada is perfect. It most certainly is not. We need only look to the thinly veiled homophobic actions and comments by the mayor of the largest city in our country to know that there are still battles to be fought on our own home soil. What we are lucky about here in Canada is that the battle has (mostly)  moved away from the systemic and legal arenas and onto the front lines: it’s become a battle of hand-to-hand combat against the last stragglers in the army of the close-minded. But because of the numerous victories, the battle has also shifted to become both more expansive and more specific, shifting focus toward trans rights or the rights of those members in the LGBT community who are also visible minorities.

In Canada, while these individual battles still rage, we have the support of the system. Most members of the LGBT community in Canada are afforded equal rights by the law. That is a powerful weapon with which to fight the individual ground battles that are still occurring. It is a weapon that many people in the world do not have at their disposal.

Plaid Mafia's WhackedHer (skating as VAGilante) gets sandwiched during the opening game of the Clam Slam.

Plaid Mafia’s WhackedHer (skating as VAGilante) gets sandwiched during the opening game of the Clam Slam. (Photo by Greg Russell)

Arguably, the most moving event at WorldPride was the mass wedding performed at Casa Loma on Thursday, June 26. Featuring nearly 120 couples from around the world, many were from countries where same-sex marriage is still not allowed. What was most shocking was that many participants were from wealthy, developed countries like Australia and South Korea. A grim reminder of how far we are from living on a globally free planet.

Across the city in Ted Reeve Arena, at the same time that this remarkable wedding was happening, representatives from 16 North American roller derby leagues were taking part in the 6th annual Clam Slam: a Pride-affiliate all-star roller derby bout run through a collaboration between Toronto Roller Derby and the Great Toronto Area Rollergirls. This year, however, there was a very special guest on hand to blow the opening whistle of the second and final game of the evening: Peaches. The singer would return the favour a few days later when a group of ToRD skaters appeared on stage during her concert.

Now an international phenomenon, Peaches has been a growing icon in the LGBT community (and well beyond!) since her first album, The Teaches of Peaches, was released in 2000. It has never seemed strange to me that the rise of Peaches’ career has coincided with the rise of flat track roller derby. Both, to me, are absolutely essential aspects of North American life in the 21st century, and both are intricately intertwined with the LGBT community as well.

2003 was an astonishing year—perhaps the first true year of the 21st century (in the same way that some people refer to 1963 as being the first year of what we think of as “The ’60s”). 2003 would be the year of SARS, the year the first deer was cloned, and the Hubble telescope would see so deep into space, it could see galaxies that existed in the few millennia after the Big Bang.

In 2003, Belgium would follow the Netherlands in legalizing same-sex marriage at a national level, while closer to home, the province of Ontario would become the first jurisdiction in the Americas to allow it.

Fans of flat track roller derby also know that in the Austin, Texas, in April, the Texas Rollergirls would host the first official game of flat track roller derby, playing under a rule set that would eventually lead to the WFTDA rule set played so widely today.

The album cover of Peaches' second album, Fatherfucker (2003).

The cover of Peaches’ second album, Fatherfucker (2003).

Peaches would release her second, break-through album, Fatherfucker in September of that year; its very title an affront to any sort of attempt at wide mainstream acceptance. Through two albums, she’d created a gender-defying persona with a heightened sexuality. And, as evidenced by the album title, she didn’t give a fuck what you thought of her. At all. She was going to be herself and she was going to shove that self in your face: you could either look away or you could do your best to take it all in and be awed by it.

My partner was enthralled by Peaches from the first time she heard Peaches’ voice slip in over top of the raw, low-fi beats that begin “Fuck the Pain Away,” the opening track of Teaches of Peaches. Her growing passion for Peaches just got bigger after she discovered and started playing roller derby, a community that as a whole seemed to share my partner’s love for the singer.

One of the first things I noticed about the roller derby community was how big the LGBT community was within it. The revival of the sport had been very much wrapped up in third-wave feminism and was fueled by a punk rock sensibility; especially in Montreal, where I was first seeing the game, roller derby and the LGBT community were fused to the point where I didn’t much think about one without the other. But I also noticed right away that the sport itself—and how inclusive, empowering and all encompassing it could be—led to a certain transcendence of politics. I once wrote about how struck I was that skaters weren’t traditionally feminist in that they didn’t seem to be caught up in a fight for acceptance or inclusion; they simply expected it.

For me, Peaches has always represented a similar attitude. A similar transcendence. For the most part, the persona of Peaches takes the point of view of a woman in her song writing, but she isn’t interested in adhering to any sort of traditional notions of what being a woman is, and as her career has gone on, her persona has become more ambiguous. She just is. There is an overt sexual “baseness” to her writing that is grounded in an extremely physical experience. She is living through her body, experiencing life through her body, and that body happens to be a female one.

Naptown Jammer Maiden America (playing for the Eager Beavers) attempts to pass Montreal's Nameless Whorror (Clam Diggers). (Photo by Greg Russell)

Naptown Jammer Maiden America (playing for the Eager Beavers) attempts to pass Montreal’s Nameless Whorror (Clam Diggers). (Photo by Greg Russell)

Along with her recording career, Peaches has also made some movies, most notably the “electro rock opera” Peaches Does Herself. A sort of psychedelic memoir, it begins as a kind of portrait of the artist as a young women, in which the audience is introduced to a mythologized version of Peaches’ creation. It is, throughout, a celebration of the female body and a carnivalized romp through a woman’s sexual awakening and then experience. Through this process, the film also lays bare the constructed nature of human gender and sexuality, then defies those constraints as the film becomes more surreal and the desires and gender of the characters become more fluid.

I was at the world premiere of Peaches Does Herself, and I remember leaving the Bloor Hot Docs cinema that night convinced that Peaches was the most important woman in the world. She represented the avant garde of female identity in the 21st century: a super-empowered, hyper-sexual being who celebrated her body—all bodies!—with a wild glee.  She was, to put it simply, free to explore how she wanted to be a woman.

Of course, I know it is naïve to think of any performer as the most important anything in the world, yet I am still convinced that the very existence of someone like Peaches makes our world a better place to live.

And I could—and have—said the same about women’s flat track roller derby. Here’s a competitive game built and shaped by women in the midst of a sporting environment absolutely dominated by men. Here’s a game that has not only welcomed the LGBT community but celebrates it, has put it at the core of its growth and has allowed it to shape the nature and attitude of the game. Here’s a sport that has eschewed all traditional notions of what a sport is and how it should be, taken a punk-rock DIY approach and made it work on a national, then cross-border, and now global scale. Roller derby, like Peaches, has become a force of nature. And I think our world is a better place for it.

 

***For the record, the Clam Slam was once again a great success that produced two really, really entertaining games of roller derby. In the first, the Plaid Mafia used a late-game comeback to defeat Team Uhaul 194-178. In the second, the Eager Beavers held off a late charge by the Clam Diggers to record the 193-154 victory. Both games were boutcast live; watch the archives here.

WP Affiliate banner***Portions of this article were excerpted from a book-length work in progress***