sports journalism

Weekend Preview: Pride + ToRD = Clam Slam!


Clam Slam II, a PrideToRD collaboration, takes place this Friday night at The Hangar and it once again features some of the finest skaters Toronto, Canada and even the United States has to offer. The Clam Slam will feature two teams of all stars: The Vagine Regime, managed by The Death Track Dolls‘  bench boss Big Chees, and The Clam Diggers who will be managed by Tri-City’s Boss Applesauce. It’s anyone’s guess as to the outcome of the bout will be, as both rosters are stacked with talent.


Jackie Daniels of the Windy City Roller Girls

In a lineup full of big hitters, ToRD’s Land Shark and Sail-Her Poon, along with Hammer City’s Lock N Roll, will be relied upon to carry a good part of the jam load for the Vagine Regime, but they could be gamely aided by Windy City‘s triple threat Jackie Daniels, a well known and respected skater who helped start the Grand Raggidy Roller Girls and now plays for the #1 ranked team in WFTDA‘s North Central Division (and also appeared in last fall’s Whip It). But given the celebratory nature of the event, expect to see some players more known for their blocking than jamming don the star, and there are definitely options. Aside from outstanding ToRD blockers like Mega Bouche, Nasher the Smasher, and Lucid Lou, and great pivots like Rebel Rock-It, Brim Stone and Bionichrome (AKA the Dolls’ Monichrome), the Vagine Regime also boasts big-hitting visitors Mirambo (Forest City Roller Girls), Grouchy LadyThug (Assault City Roller Derby), BruiseBerry Pie (GTA Rollergirls’ Derby Debutantes), Sofanda Beatin (Tri-City) and Nameless Whorror  (Montreal). Primarily a team of veterans, P Doddy joins her Betties teammate Poon as the only rookies on the lineup.

Mexican Jumping Mean from San Fransisco's Bay Area Derby Girls


Despite that intimidating roster, the Clam Diggers have nothing to fear.  While they might not boast as much of a powerful pack, the may be able to lay claim to more natural jammers. Familiar face Sista Fista (who played two season with ToRD’s Dolls before returning to Victoria’s Eves of Destruction) will lead Getcha Kicks (GTAR’s Derby Debutantes), Kari-Mia Beere (ToRD’s Chicks Ahoy!), and ToRD veteran Memphis Kitty (Smoke City Betties) at the jam line.  There’s also a good chance that Dyna Vagina (AKA the Chicks’ Dyna Hurtcha),  Firweed (Chicks) and Mexican Jumping Mean (From the Bay Area Derby Girls) will be thrown the star as well. What the Diggers’ pack lacks in pure power, it may make up positionally. The three Tri-City skaters on the roster (Anita Martini, sine-e-star and Bareleigh Legal) play together on both the Tri-City Thunder and the Vicious Dishes and are all key components of the recent successes of that league and its teams, and the great development of their pack control and pace strategies. Waxey McBush is a rookie with Montreal’s defending champion Les Filles Du Roi and has looked strong positionally early on in her first season. Two ToRD rookies will be joining her for their first Clam Slams as well (The Gores’ Shiver-Me-Timbers [AKA Aston Martini] and Hot Boxx [AKA Chronic]); a few veterans, Victoria’s Lady Cuntessa, Hammer City’s Perky Set and ToRD’s Hot Roller and Hoff will be relied up to hold things together in the pack.

However you look at it, both teams balance out in the end which is a bonus for fans. While you can expect all the big hits and strategic packs as you would in any roller derby bout, there will be a more playful element to the proceedings: If last year’s Clam Slam is any indication this will be an exciting celebration of roller derby and a can’t miss Pride event.

* I was recently interviewed by Bryan Mcwilliam from Gear Up for Sports. He has been doing a great job following ToRD this season introducing it to a new audience and giving roller derby the sports-page treatment that it deserves. The interview was part of his Clam Slam preview. You can read it here.


Clam Diggers

Anita Martini 9 (Tri City Roller Girls, Kitchener)
Bareleigh Legal 18 (TCRG, Kitchener)
Dyna Vagina 21 (ToRD)
Fireweed -40  (ToRD)
Getcha Kicks 76 (GTA Rollergirls, Toronto)
Hoff 65+ (ToRD)
Hot Boxx 60gritt (ToRD)
Hot Roller 48 (ToRD)
Kari Mia Beer 6 (ToRD)
Lady Cuntessa 702w (Eves of Distruction, Victoria)
Memphis Kitty 56 (ToRD)
Mexican Jumping Mean 7 (B.A.D Girls, San Francisco)
Perky Set 3 (HCRG, Hamilton)
Scissor-Me-Timbers 510 (ToRD)
sin-e-star 306 (TCRG, Kitchener)
Sista Fista 54u (Eves, Victoria)
Waxey McBush 200$/hr (MTLRD, Montreal)

Manager: Boss Applesauce (TCRG)

Vagine Regime

Bionichrome 35 (ToRD)
Brim Stone 2:18 (ToRD)
BruiseBerry Pie 31 (GTA Rollergirls, Toronto)
Fubar Bundy 765 (ToRD)
The Grouchy LadyThug 12:00 (Assault City Roller Derby, Syracruse NY)
Jackie Daniels No7 (Windy City Roller Girls, Chicago Ill)
Land Shark 33 (ToRD)
Lock N Roll 00 (HCRG, Hamilton)
Lucid Lou 12:34 (ToRD)
Mega Mouth 26 (ToRD)
Mirambo (Forest City Roller Girls, London)
Nameless Whorror 202  (MTLRD, Montreal)
Nasher the Smasher 2×4 (ToRD)
P Doddy 32 (ToRD)
Rebel Rock It  7 (ToRD)
Sail Her Poon 090w (ToRD)
Sofanda Beatin 420 (TCRG, Kitchener)

Manager: Big Chees (ToRD)

The Jammer Quotient: A Look Back at 2008 (1)

Mach Wheels vs. Bambi

ToRD‘s second full season saw the continued dominance of the Chicks Ahoy! (4-1) and the Gore-Gore Rollergirls (4-1). Needless to say, the jammers from these two teams enjoyed successful seasons as well, and the JQs reflect the differing offensive philosophies of the two teams. ToRD continued to be a six-team league, but by 2008 the disparity among the teams was becoming obvious.  It would be the final season for the DVAS (1-4) and the Bay Street Bruisers (0-5), although not for the skaters on the teams. In the end,  the Chicks took The Boot away from the Gores in an exciting, high scoring final(114-97). (*as with the 2007 calculation of the JQ, the plus/minus stats are unavailable, for 2008 meaning the highest possible JQ is 40, but I’ve added an adjusted score based on percentage for the top 5)


Jammer Total Points Points Per Jam Plus/ Minus Jam % Lead % JQ
Bambi (GGR) 10 8 N/A 7 9 34 (43)
Dust Bunny (GGR) 9 4 N/A 7 8 28 (35)
Sista Fista (DTD) 8 1 N/A 10 6 25 (32)
Desmond Deck Her (GGR) 5 10 N/A 0 3 18 (23)
Jewel Kicker (SCB) 7 0 N/A 3 7 17 (21)
Mach Wheels (CA!) 0 7 N/A 0 10 17
Candy Crossbones (CA!) 4 5 N/A 1 5 15
Aimee Zing (CA!) 6 9 N/A 0 0 15
Ce Four (BSB) 2 0 N/A 9 0 11
Dolly Destructo (CA!) 0 6 N/A 0 2 8
Shell B Felt (DVAS) 0 0 N/A 8 0 8

Bambi (who skated as Alicia Arsenic in 2007) had an amazing year, scoring a JQ of  34. Dust Bunny built on her success from the 2007 season by putting up strong numbers once again. But it was the Chicks Ahoy, led by Mach Wheels and another impressive year by Candy Crossbones, who put four skaters in the top ten. This reflects the strategies of the two teams that remain today. The Gores had a set line up of jammers (Desmond Deck Her and the emerging Lunchbox were the other two) while the Chicks were more democratic in their use of jammers, choosing to spread the workload over more skaters (a total of six Chicks’ jammers were eligible for JQ points). But it wasn’t all Chicks all the time as all four other teams had jammers in the top ten as well, led by the Death Track Dolls’ amazing west-coast import, Sista Fista. Sista  finished the season with the 3rd highest JQ and helped lead the Dolls to an impressive 4-1 record.

Below is the breakdown by category for rankings of each of the four stats used to determine the 2008 JQ.


Jammer Total Points
Bambi (GGR) 286 (10)
Dust Bunny (GGR) 227 (9)
Sista Fista (DTD) 218 (8)
Jewel Kicker (SCB) 160 (7)
Aimee Zing (CA!) 157 (6)
Desmond Deck-Her (GGR) 152 (5)
Candy Crossbones (CA!) 142 (4)
Lunchbox (GGR) 128 (3)
Ce Four (BSB) 125 (2)
Miss Tress Nightmare (DTD) 124 (1)

The top five in total points featured skaters from four different teams, with Bambi and Dust Bunny leading the way for the high scoring Gores followed by Sista and the consistent Jewel Kicker of the Smoke City Betties. Aimee Zing rounds out the top five, having completed her transition from blocker to jammer during the 2008 season. This would be the only category that Bambi, the jammer with the highest JQ, would lead. No skater would lead in more than one category.

Points Per Jam

Jammer Points Per Jam
Desmond Deck-Her (GGR) 4.9 (10)
Aimee Zing (CA!) 4.24 (9)
Bambi (GGR) 3.92 (8)
Mach Wheels (CA!) 3.70 (7)
Dolly Destructo (CA!) 3.52 (6)
Candy Crossbones (DVAS) 3.16 (5)
Dust Bunny (GGR) 3.11 (4)
Lunchbox (GGR) 2.844 (3)
Mala Justed (CA!) 2.84 (2)
Sista Fista (DTD) 2.79 (1)

The points-per-jam numbers came down slightly from their stratospheric highs in 2007 with no one averaging more than 5 points per jam (three jammers averaged more than that in ’07). Desmond Deck-Her’s overall average may have dropped (from 5.24 in ’07), but her ranking jumped from third to first. She also had the biggest jam of the season (a monstrous 25 points) which undoubtedly helped her numbers. The Chicks more score-by-committee approach landed three skaters in the top five including Mach Wheels who jammed much more than usual in 2008 with very consistent results.


Jammer Jam %
Sista Fista (DTD) 38.42 (10)
Ce Four (BSB) 33.16 (9)
Shell B Felt (DVAS) 32.78 (8)
Bambi (GGR) 32.3 (7)
Dust Bunny (GGR) 32.3 (7)
Sue Saint Marie (BSB) 28.5 (5)
Land Shark (DVAS) 26.67(4)
Jewel Kicker (SCB) 25.75 (3)
Miss Tress Nightmare (DTD) 25.12 (2)
Candy Crossbones (CA!) 22.17 (1)

For the second straight year a Doll led this category, as Sista Fista jammed an astonishing 38.42% of her teams jams. This was the most wide open category with members of all six teams in the top ten. Land Shark, another rookie stand out with a bright future, picks up her first JQ points. The Dolls, Bruisers, Gores, and D-VAS all had multiple skaters in this category. It is interesting to note that aside from Sista’s huge percentage, the average jam % was down from 2007 as more and more skaters become comfortable jamming.

Lead %

Sista Fista gets help scoring against the DVAS


Jammer Lead %
Mach Wheels (CA!) 61 (10)
Bambi (GGR) 59 (9)
Dust Bunny (GGR) 58 (8)
Jewel Kicker (SCB) 57 (7)
Sista Fista (DTD) 55 (6)
Candy Crossbones (CA!) 53 (5)
Dyna Hurtcha (SCB) 52.17 (4)
Desmond Deck-Her (GGR) 51.61 (3)
Dolly Destructo (DVAS) 49 (2)
Miss Tress Nightmare (DTD) 47 (1)

Despite being better known now for her amazing assists and her nearly flawless positional blocking, in 2008 Mach Wheels was one of the most efficient jammers in ToRD ranking fourth in points per jam and first in lead %. Dyna Hurtcha, who would go on to win ToRD’s 2009 Triple Threat, was already putting up triple-threat-style numbers in 2008.  Dust Bunny continued to pad her career stats with yet another top three rank.

2008 Blocker stats are coming up tomorrow; next week a two part preview of The Beast of the East.

The Jammer Quotient: A Look Back at 2007 (1)

Chicks Ahoy! vs. Gore-Gore Roller Girls (2007)

In the lead up to ToRD’s 2010 regular season, I decided to take a look back at the jammer quotients from the 2007, 2008, and 2009 seasons. The jammer quotient is a statistical comparison of jammers based on a jammer’s rating in five categories. As expected, over a full season, the JQs were quite close, and the rating rewarded the most consistent jammer. The one limitation that I had is that the data for one of the five JQ categories (plus/minus) is not available for ToRD’s first two seasons; thus the highest JQ a player could possibly achieve in either 2007 or 2008 was 40 (though I’ve added adjusted scores in parentheses based on percentage). Those first two seasons are also interesting in that ToRD was then a six-team league consisting of the 2007 champion Gore-Gore Roller Girls (GGR), 2008 champion Chicks Ahoy! (CA!), the Smoke City Betties (SCB), the Death Track Dolls (DTD), and the two defunct teams: the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad (DVAS) and the Bay Street Bruisers (BSB).    



Jammer Total Points Points Per Jam Plus/ Minus Jam % Lead % JQ
Dust Bunny (GGR) 10 7 N/A 4 9 30 (38)
Candy Crossbones (CA!) 7 10 N/A 0 8 25 (32)
Jewel Kicker (SCB) 4 4 N/A 6 10 24 (30)
Desmond Deck Her (GGR) 8 8 N/A 0 6 22 (28)
Dolly Destructo (CA!) 9 6 N/A 5 0 20 (25)
G-Force! (CA!) 6 1 N/A 7 5 19
Jubilee (DTD) 5 3 N/A 8 0 16
Ce Four (BSB) 0 0 N/A 9 5 14
Ice Pick (DVAS) 1 9 N/A 1 2 13
Miss Tress Nightmare (DTD) 3 0 N/A 10 0 13


The 2007 champion Gore-Gore Rollergirls produced two of the top five rated jammers, a tradition of depth at the position that has continued to this day. Dust Bunny didn’t exactly run away with the JQ, but the largest gap between positions was the 5 point gap between her first place JQ and Candy Crossbones’ second place one. A 3 point gap between sixth place G-Force! And seventh place Jubilee was the second largest gap. Over the course of the season, it was consistency that paid off with Dust Bunny being one of only three jammers to gain points in all four categories. (The others were G-Force! and Ice Pick.) No Jammer led in more than one category but Dust Bunny came first in total points and second in lead %. While Demolition Dawn (SCB) was statistically the biggest triple threat (with an average of at least three jams per bout as pivot, blocker, and jammer), Dolly Destructo spent the most time in the pack of the JQ rated skaters, and recorded a very high number of hits (38) and a knockdown percentage of 58%.

Below is the breakdown by category for rankings of each of the four stats used to determine the 2007 JQ.


Jammer Total Points
Dust Bunny (GGR) 173 (10)
Dolly Destructo (CA!) 167 (9)
Desmond Deck Her (GGR) 152 (8)
Candy Crossbones (CA!) 143(7)
G-Force! (CA!) 142 (6)
Jubilee (DTD) 134 (5)
Jewel Kicker (SCB) 128 (4)
Miss Tress Nightmare (DTD) 119(3)
Alicia Arsenic (GGR) 113 (2)
Ice Pick (DVAS) 112(1)

The Gore-Gore Roller girls and Chicks Ahoy! were the dominant teams in 2007 and it showed in the total points category as members of each team held down the top five positions.


Jammer Points Per Jam
Candy Crossbones (CA!) 5.5 (10)
Ice Pick (DVAS) 5.33 (9)
Desmond Deck Her (GGR) 5.24 (8)
Dust Bunny (GGR) 4.55 (7)
Dolly Destructo (CA!) 4.51 (6)
Japanna (DVAS) 4.32 (5)
Jewel Kicker (SCB) 3.88 (4)
Jubilee (DTD) 3.83 (3)
Kandy Barr (GGR) 3.67 (2)
G-Force! (CA!) 3.55 (1)

Despite not even finishing in the top ten in jam %, Candy Crossbones finished fourth in points scored, and made the most of her limited opportunities by scoring an amazing 5.5 points per jam over the course of the season.


Jammer Jam %
Miss Tress Nightmare (DTD) 35.24 (10)
Ce Four (BSB) 33.65 (9)
Jubilee (DTD) 33.33 (8)
G-Force! (CA!) 33.06 (7)
Jewel Kicker (SCB) 32.35 (6)
Dolly Destructo (CA!) 30.58 (5)
Dust Bunny (GGR) 29.01(4)
Alicia Arsenic (GGR) 26.12 (3)
JJ Bladez (DVAS) 25.00 (2)
Ice Pick (DVAS) 22.43 (1)

Miss Tress Nightmare was ToRD’s workhorse of 2007, wearing the star for an amazing 35% of the 0-3 Death Track Doll’s jams. All in all seven skaters jammed for about 1/3 of their teams jams.


Jammer Lead %
Jewel Kicker (SCB) 61 (10)
Dust Bunny (GGR) 58 (9)
Candy Crossbones (CA!) 54 (8)
Alicia Arsenic (GGR) 49 (7)
Desmond Deck Her (GGR) 48 (6)
Ce Four (BSB) 43 (5)
G-Force! (CA!) 43 (5)
Japanna (DVAS) 42 (3)
Ice Pick (DVAS) 38 (2)
Kandy Barr (GGR) 37 (1)

Given the sheer number of jams each of them took part in over the course of the seasons, Jewel Kicker and Dust Bunny put up absolutely amazing percentages in this category. It will be interesting to see if the comparative parity amongst the ToRD teams in 2010 will allow for such high averages from any player.

2008 and 2009 JQs are coming soon.

Word on the track

Ewan Wotarmy lines up Lady Gagya; Rebel Rock-It attempts to cut through the pack (New Skids on the Block vs. CN Power 03/27/10)


In a Quad City Chaos preview I’d speculated that Montreal’s New Skids on the Block may have been the hottest WFTDA team in 2010. I was basing my statement on the fact that after opening 2010 with 2 tough losses to highly ranked WFTDA teams, the Skids have won their final five bouts by huge margins (not to mention a couple of one-sided victories against non-WFTDA teams). So, with all that in mind, are the Skids really the hottest WFTDA skaters in 2010?

According to the numbers on (WFTDA points and 0verall rankings), there are four teams in the running, but I’m not going to count the Oly Rollers because their biggest leap in points actually occurred at the 2009 WFTDA Nationals (even if only reflected in the opening standings of 2010). So that leaves Montreal against the Bellingham Roller Betties and the Slaughter County Roller Vixens. In terms of point differential (flattrack stats uses a very precise, complicated and fascinating algorithm to determine its points; you can read all about it here), Slaughter County has made the greatest leap in 2010 (75.55 points). This is only slightly higher than Bellingham’s 65.89 point leap and Montreal’s 62.88 point leap. What is important to note though, is how each team’s ranking has changed. Bellingham has only moved 3 spots from 72nd to 69th overall (and upon further inspection, did so based not on their own victories, but on the losses of others). Similarly, while Slaughter County had the biggest points increase, they only  jumped 13 spots (70th -57th), and they too relied upon the losses of others (and their own losses to highly ranked teams), and one big victory over Central Coast. In terms of rankings, Montreal is the clear winner in this category, jumping a remarkable 24 spots so for in 2010 (from 58th to 34th, and 13th to 8th in the Eastern Region). More importantly, they did so based not on the misfortunes of other teams, but on the strength of their own victories. So what had begun as simple hyperbole, has turned out to be true: Montreal’s New Skids on the Block are indeed the hottest team in WFTDA.

(Check here for a recap of the Skids’ recent 3 game, east coast road trip).


Speaking of hot teams! With their 170-119 victory over 11th ranked Madison, the top ranked defending WFTDA champion Oly Rollers took one more step toward a big record with their 14th consecutive WFTDA sanctioned victory. They are now only 4 wins away from Gotham‘s record of 18 strait victories; a two-year streak that ended last year. (The DNN roundup of Oly’s victory also includes a very good recap of the Hammer City-hosted WFTDA sanctioned bout between the Eh! Team and the New Skids on the Block prior to The Quad City Chaos.)


Although men’s bouts have been happening since the start of derby’s modern revival, and random teams having been popping up all over the place (including Western Canada), for the first time an organized league has been formed. The Men’s Derby Coalition (MDC) (featuring teams in Baltimore, New York, Connecticut and Massachusetts) kicked off play on March 27th, 2010. (The Derby News Network provides a great season preview.)


While most eastern Canadian leagues kick off their home leagues in May, the Tri-City Roller Girls are starting their season pre Beast of the East this year, on April 10th, with a bout between defending champs The Vicious Dishes and their Tri-City rivals The Venus Fly Tramps. Both teams will be looking to get some important game-practice in leading up to BOE 2010.


Look for a look back at Beast of the East ’09, a preview of BOE ’10, and team previews for the upcoming ToRD season.

Quad City Chaos: Recap

Defecaitlin fights through Terminal City's pack.


No surprises at this weekend’s Quad City Chaos, unless Montreal’s New Skids being even better than advertised could be considered a surprise. Montreal easily won the first annual Quad City Chaos invitational, posting lop-sided victories over all involved, including topping 200 points in two of their three bouts. CN Power (2-1) finished a strong second in the tournament, with Hammer City’s Eh! Team third after edging a game Terminal City squad in an exciting and closely contested conclusion to the tournament.






New Kids on the Block (MTLRD)





CN Power (ToRD)





Eh! Team (Hammer City)





Terminal City All Stars (TCRG)






The bouts involving CN Power, The Eh! Team, and the Terminal City All Stars were all close, hard fought battles, with the teams often changing leads. The differences between these three teams were negligible at best, and you got the feeling that on any given night any one of these teams could prevail. That parity made for an exciting weekend and bodes well for the future of roller derby in Canada.

After a disorganized, and potentially jet-lagged opening half against the CN Power, Terminal City noticeably improved with each bout, often quickly adapting to the nuances of the eastern game and the strategies of the opposing teams.

Brim Stone and Perky Set at the top of the pack.

Skater for skater the girls from Vancouver matched up well. Despite the 0-3 record, The All Stars showed moments of brilliance over the weekend; at times this team was like a shape shifter, adapting to and countering strategies of other teams. They were capable of keeping Montreal under 200 points (160) almost solely due to their defense on power jams. Not wanting to get into a slow, strategic positional-blocking battle with the Skids, they instead elected to race ahead of the Montreal blockers and stretch the pack to encourage one on one battles. This also forced the jammer to work twice as hard, resulting in extremely fast-paced, low scoring jams.

The Eh! Team looked a little unpracticed at times this weekend, with loose formations and no answers to the pack strategies being employed by the Skids. But they had some great jamming and also improved with each bout and will undoubtedly use this weekend as a starting point for what should be a challenging but exciting WFTDA season.

Even missing a few star players, The New Skids on the Block look poised to make a breakthrough in WFTDA’s Eastern division. Almost militant in their preparation and surgical in the execution of strategy, Montreal constantly frustrated the other teams with a few different blocker traps (at the back and on the line), some well-timed and well-placed hits, and an almost unhitable arsenal of jammers. This is a team to watch in 2010, and, as long as the players stay healthy, should make its well-deserved debut in the WFTDA Regionals.

Collide-O-Skope Kid and Iron Wench at the line.


Such a long tournament and there were so many amazing performances that it is hard to narrow down key players on each side. Terminal City’s Lambe Baste Her, Luludemon, and Roller Girl provided strong jamming all weekend, while Barra Couga was a tenacious thorn in more than a few sides. LA Gunns did not look like someone returning from a major injury and delivered some serious hits in the pack, and 8-Mean Wheeleer provided solid leadership.

For the Eh! Team, Carla Coma and Vicadoom continued to carry the jam load, but big hitter Bitchslap Barbie stepped in against TCRG and put up a lot of points in the victory. Perky Set battaled hard all weekend, and Lock N Roll made her return to The Hangar wearing a visitor’s jersey for the first time, and looked up to the tastk, even taking her turn with the star against her former CN Power teammates.

The New Skids on the Block simply had no weaknesses in its lineup. The Iron Wench continued to show that she is a world class jammar, with strong suport from Lyn-dah Kicks and Georgie W. Tush.  Jess Bandit proved that she can lead a pack with the best of them, and Ewan Wotarmy and Smack Daddy did double duty, providing solid pack blocking with some energetic jams.


Mach Wheels holds Avi Hater outside while Lunchbox takes the inside.

Any way you look at it, this was an extraordinarily successful weekend for the members of CN Power. They had an opportunity to test themselves against the best that the country had to offer and managed to grind out two impressive victories; perhaps more importantly, they faced intelligent, tough opponents with different strengths and weaknesses, which will undoubtedly teach them a lot going forward. While the two victories were important, the way they happened was potentially more so.

Feeling confident and urged on by the home crowd, CN Power came out flying in its opening game against Terminal City. Employing a strategy of slow packs and aggressive jamming (reminiscent of their victory over The Rideau Valley Vixens), the trio of Lunch Box, Land Shark, and Defecailtlin lead the team to a huge lead early against a bewildered, and unfocused Vancouver squad, taking a 40 point lead into halftime. But the second half was another story and the All Stars were like a different team–relentless defense, aggressive hitting, and defensive jamming all contributed to a much more competitive second half, and although CN Power held on for a 97-79 victory, they  paid a physical price for it in the end.

The effects of playing back-to-back bouts were obvious as the hometeam fell behind early against their provincial rivals from Hamilton (55-49 at the half). But CN Power, still stinging after a two year losing streak to the Eh! Team, sent a clear message in the second half: the team has come to play in 2010. With Defecaitlin seeing limited action due to injury, Bambi stepped up and provided key jams in the second half, and in a spirited effort, CN Power took the lead and held on for an amazing 89-87 victory.

It was a different story against the Skids. After an emotionally exhausting Saturday, CN Power was never really able to get anything going against the powerhouses on Sunday. Constantly frustrated,  CN Power did show signs of the potential for a stronger performance late: even in the face of such opposition, Lunchbox was her usual calm self and provided some much needed consistency at the jam line, and Land Shark displayed a new level of toughness mixing it up with (and even getting the better of ) Montreal’s super pivot Jess Bandit on a few occasions. CN Power also showed some ingenuity in the second half  including giving Montreal a taste of its own medicine with a well executed trap. But in the end the inability to defend against the power jam allowed the Skids to run up the score.

Brim Stone and Rebel Rock-It provided solid leadership up front all weekend and Nasher the Smasher, making her 2010 debut, also looked comfortable in the stripe. Mach Wheels continues to impress with her unbelievable control and poise and made more than her fair share of hilight-worthy assists on the weekend (including an impressive ‘waitress’ against the Skids).


This weekend also saw the launch of ToRD.TV, a site dedicated to hilighting ToRD and its skaters. Keep an eye out for upcoming specials (interviews, bout hilights, etc…) from this weekend’s Quad City Chaos.

Quad City Chaos Preview: Terminal City All Stars

For most derby fans here in the east, the Terminal City Roller Girls are an unknown quantity; unfortunately, the same goes for the Derby Nerd. But I’ve got scouts working out west and have been watching my fair share of video to prepare this Terminal City primer for all the fans at Quad City Chaos. Part of the original wave of derby growth in Canada in 2006, Terminal City has grown into a well established three-team league. The play widely in western Canada, but also south of the border where they’ve earned their cred playing some of the finest derby teams on the left coast (including representatives from the Oly Rollers and Rat City). Last year, Bad Reputations took the TCRG league championship against the Riot Squad (Faster Pussycats rounds out the competition in the league).

Bouts: Vs. Toronto’s CN Power (2pm on the 27th); Vs. Montreal’s New Skids on the Block (6:30pm on the 27th); Vs. Hamilton’s The Eh! Team (3:30pm on the 28th).

Starting up front, expect to see Tiki Timebomb and Bustylicious spend their fair share of time wearing the stripe and leading the way, with pack support from big hitter Barra Couga, Shift Kicker, and Sissy Straight-edge, while LA Gunns supplies  assists for her jammers, 8-Mean Wheeler holds the line. Expect triple threats Luludemon and former “most feared” award winner Lucrushya Boardya to also have a big impact in the tournament.

The Terminal City All Stars look as if they also have a lot of depth at jammer with many girls able to step up and wear the star. The champion Bad Reputations will be well represented at the jam line lead by veteran skater RollerGirl. Look for her to share duties with former rookie of the year Avi Hater, Lamb Baste-her (who can also provide some solid hitting), Collide-O-Scope Kid, and Booty Quake.


They’ll need top performances from all of those potential jammers to match up with the depth of jammers in the tournament, particularly from the New Skids, but they’ll also need to be willing to be defensive against the aggressive jammers from CN Power. In the pack they’re going to need to maintain the scrappiness and persistent aggression that they’ll face against the Eh! Team, but keep control of things against the the Skids’ tight packs and CN Power’s active pivots.


The Derby Nerd picked victories for the other teams against the Terminal City All Stars, but honestly the Terminal City skaters could very easily come east, pull an Oly Rollers and completely dominate the whole tournament. Like the Derby News Network says, watching video “aint at all like being there!”, so earlier predictions were based on video comparisons, which just don’t cut it. What I can safely predict, is that this is going to be an amazing and competitive tournament featuring the highest level of roller derby yet seen in Canada.


(Jersey number and club team in parentheses)

Avi Hater (747 Riot Girls), Barra Couga (25 & Under  Bad Reputations), Booty Quake (8.0 Bad Reputations), Bustylicious (33 Riot Girls), Collide-O-Scope Kid (3 Bad Reputations), 8-Mean Wheeler (18 Faster Pussycats),  LA Gunns (0.45 Bad Reputations), Lamb Baste-Her (K0 Bad Reputations), Lucrushya Boardya (4 Riot Girls), Luludemon (44 Riot Girls), RollerGirl (77 Bad Reputations), Roxie Hardknox (16 Riot Girls), Shift Kicker (27 Faster Pussycats), Sissy Straight-edge (2 Faster Pussycats), Tiki TimeBomb (3.2.1 Faster Pussycats)

Quad City Chaos Preview: The Eh! Team

This should be a huge year for Hammer City. The Eh! Team is currently ranked 17th in WFTDA‘s North Central division, and look to move forward from there. The experience they will gain and the quality of competition they will face will undoubtedly expedite their growth.  They opened 2010 with a tough loss against The Fort Wayne Derby Girls Bomb Squad, but will only get stronger as the year progresses. Like the Skids, their roadtrip featured a fairly lean roster, so they’ll have a lot of skaters eager for action at the Quad City Chaos.


Games: Vs. ToRD’s CN Power (4:30pm ont he 27th); Vs. Vancouver’s Terminal City All Stars (3:30pm on the 28th).

Up front , The Eh! Team is going to need to make sure that they keep their packs tight and quick. Look for the solid Perky Set and Judge Jodie to be leading the way pivoting, but it will be imperative that the big hitters in the pack like Ivy Rupted, Haykeye Pierce, Eduskating Rita, and Dicey keep things together and make sure that they stay unified in their defense.  Expect Bitchslap Barbie to throw more than her fair share of shoulders and hips around the track. Also watch for the return to The Hangar of former ToRD standout Lock N Roll, who will certainly be relied upon for her blocking abilities and could potentially run a few jams as pivot.

The workhorse Carla Coma and the speedy Vicadoom twill take the jam line as the Eh! Team’s 1-2 punch, but you can expect scrappy jams from the tough-as-nails Mean Little Momma and the fearless Dicey too. It will be key for Hammer City’s jammers to hold their own against the opposing jammers, including stepping up defensively when necessary.


The Eh! Team will need to keep an active pack if they want to succeed at Quad City, and that means keeping things tight and maintaining a physical level of play. They’ll also have to follow the lead of their pivots and help their jammer when needed. While the Hammer City girls can hold a mean line, they’ll also need to be sure that they aren’t getting beaten to the outside. Their jammers will be relied upon defensively too and will need to take an active role in neutralizing the opposing jammers.


1-2 and third place in the tournament. Things could get tough for Hammer City; they have to contend with a fired-up CN Power in front of their home crowd, and Montreal has far more bouts under their belts at this point in 2010 and could be a step or two in front of everyone because of this. The Eh! Team will be hungry for a victory by the end though, and are bound to take out their frustrations against the Terminal City All Stars.


(Jersey numbers and club teams in parentheses)

Bitchslap Barbie (98 Hamilton Harlots), Boom Boom Betty (31 HamiltonHarlots), Carla Coma (621 Hamilton Harlots), Chainsaw Mary (NC17 Hamilton Harlots), Cut Off (706 Death Row Dames), Dicey (905 Hamilton Harlots), Eduskating Rita (2009), Hawkeye Fierce (4077 Hamilton Harlots), Hozone Slayer (Death Row Dames HO3), Ivy Rupted (4 Death Row Dames), Jett Girl (15 Hamilton Harlots), Judge Jodie (67 Hamilton Harlots), Little Red Rollerhood (7 Death Row Dames), Lock N Roll (00), Mean Little Mama (0 Death Row Dames), Miss Carriage (33 Death Row Dames), Perky Set (3 Hamilton Harlots), Snuffette (822 Hamilton Harlots), Tori Nado (8 Death Row Dames), Vicadoom (420 Hamilton Harlots)

Quad City Chaos Preview: New Skids on the Block

Montreal’s New Skids on the Block have certainly been the busiest team in Canada in 2010, and just may be the hottest team in WFTDA! Having played in a number of games south of the border this year, the skaters are coming to Toronto in game shape. They’ve just returned from an east coast road trip that saw them go 3-0 making some pretty good competition look pretty bad. According to, their current winning streak has them sitting in 8th place in WFTDA’s Eastern Region, a huge leap from 13th where they started the year. Needless to say, this is a very good team with very few weaknesses. To make matters worse for the competition at Quad City, the Skids only carried an 11 person roster on their road trip, meaning they’ll have plenty of fresh faces for the tournament.


Games: Vs. Vancouver’s Terminal City All Stars (6:30pm on the 27th); Vs. ToRD’s CN Power (1pm on the 28th).

The New Skids on the Block are making quite a name for themselves by their ability to handle a pack, and who’s going to argue with players like Smack Daddy, Trash ‘N Smash, Nameless Whorror, Bone Machine, Wrath Poutine, Jess Bandit…well you get the idea. This is not a pack to take lightly. There is power, skill and depth up front and it will take a huge effort by an opposing pivot to wrestle control away from them. Word on the track is that key veteran Beater Pan Tease has been nursing a knee injury that caused her to sit out the recent round trip. Although her name is penciled into the roster, it remains to be seen how much of a role she will have at Quad City. For the fan’s sake, let’s hope she’s healed up and ready to go.

There is no less depth at jammer on this team. Led by the phenomenal Iron Wench, the Skids will undoubtedly rotate Georgia W. Tush, Izzy Skellington,  Ewan Wotarmy, and Romeo at the jam line, but don’t be surprised to see some of the blockers mentioned above (and even some who haven’t been!) get a shot with a star. This is a diverse, well-organized team that can mix it up positionally based on the situation.


Their jammer’s ability to neutralize the other team’s jammer will be key.These are jammers who can mix it up with other jammers and even blockers if needs be, but they also have the endurance to out pace a pack. But despite the unbelievable depth at jammer, victory in this tournament will be based on the Skids’ pack control. Their ability to trap blockers and pace packs will be what separates them from the competition.


The Skids will go undefeated in the tournament and take first over all, but it won’t be easy. While I don’t think the Skids are invincible (and The Eh! Team was within spitting distance in a bout against them last year, losing by only 4 points), they are simply too hot right now. They have burst out of the gates in 2010 and have been playing a lot of games against some solid competition, so I think they are ahead of the other teams in terms of game-readiness.


(Jersey number and club team in parentheses)

Beater Pan-Tease (1976 Les Filles du Roi),  Bone Machine (1111 La Racaille), Cheese Grater (289 Contrabanditas), Ewan Wotarmy (7734 Les Contrabanditas), Georgia W Tush (Contrabanditas), Iron Wench (516 La Racaille), Izzy Skellington (182, La Racaille), Jess Bandit (8 Les Filles du Roi), Lady J (86), Lyn-dah Kicks (75 La Racaille), No Holds Bard (2X4 La Racaille), Romeo (222 Les Filles du Roi), Smack Daddy (3X Les Filles du Roi), Trash N’ Smash (1.18 Contrabanditas), Karla Shnikov (AK 47 Contrabanditas), Lil Mama (2 Les Filles du Roi), Nameless Whorror (202 Les Filles du Roi), Rae Volver (38 Les Filles du Roi), Wrath Poutine (30 La Racaille)

Beater Pan-Tease (1976 Les Filles du Roi),  Bone Machine   (1111  ), Cheese Grater (289), (Ewan Wotarmy 7734 Les Contrabanditas), Georgia W Tush (Contrabanditas), Iron Wench (516 La Racaille), Izzy Skellington (182, La Racaille), Jess Bandit (8), Lady J (86), Lyn-dah Kicks (75), No Holds Bard (2X4), Romeo (222 Les Filles du Roi), Smack Daddy (3X Les Filles du Roi), Trash N’ Smash (Contrabanditas), Karla Shnikov (AK 47), Lil Mama (2), Nameless Whorror  (202), Rae Volver (38), Wrath Poutine (30 La Racaille)

Quad City Chaos Preview: CN Power

The Quad City Chaos is a four team round robin style tournament that will be played over the 27th and 28th of March at The Hangar. It will feature four of the best roller derby rosters in Canada, the all star teams from the leagues in Toronto, Hamilton, Montreal and Vancouver. The complete schedule can be found here. I’m going to start my four part Quad City Chaos preview with, who else? The hosts, Toronto’s CN Power.


Games: Vs. Vancouver‘s Terminal City All Stars (2pm on the 27th); Vs. Hamilton’s Eh! Team (4:30pm on the 27th); Vs. Montreal’s New Skids on the Block (1pm on the 28th).

CN Power kicked off 2010 with a lopsided victory over the scrappy Rideau Valley Vixens, exactly the kind of confidence booster that this squad needed after an uneven 2009. The 2010 version of CN Power looks focused and organized, and they’ll need both given the nature of the competition in this tournament.

The key to the victory over the Vixens was an uncontainable early onslaught by three of ToRD‘s top jammers, Lunchbox, Land Shark, and 2009 Jammer of the Year Defecaitlin (AKA: Dust Bunny). I don’t see CN Power veering too much from that strategy this this weekend, and the return of Bambi to the lineup will give them the depth that they will need as the weekend progresses. Over the course of the tournament, keep an eye out for jams from Betty Bomber, Memphis Kitty, 2009 rookie of the year Kari Mia Beere, and Marvel S. Maven, the standout sophomore who had an amazing 100% lead percentage in the bout against the Vixens.

Hit for hit, CN Power can go shoulder to hip with any team in the country. With the likes of Mega Mouth (AKA: Mega Bouche), Nasher the Smasher, Hoff, Lady Gagya and Dolly Destructo throwing hits, there will be no shortage of toughness on this squad. The return to the line up of 2009 Triple Threat winner Dyna Hurtcha will make up for the loss of Seka Destroy, who was excellent in her CN Power debut against the Vixens. Another big hitter, Jubilee, also has returned to ToRD after a year-long hiatus and will be making her 2010 CN Power debut at the tournament.

While they will need top jamming and big hitting to match up against Terminal City and The Eh! Team, in the key Sunday afternoon bout against The New Skids, CN Power will need to wrestle control of the pack from the pack-masters from Montreal; that means pivots Brim Stone, Rebel Rock-It , and Mach Wheels will need to control a tight pack when the stripe’s on their helmets. Also the consistency and calming influence of veteran Demolition Dawn will go a long way over the course of the grueling weekend. Look for sophomore skater Panty Hoser (who was also solid in her CN Power debut) to get some very important experience leading her pack.


Laying down the law early will be key for ToRD. It was the quick, efficient rotation of  ToRD’s top three jammers early on in the bout against the Vixens that sealed the deal in the season opener and they will need to establish that presence at Quad City. Also, keeping calm in the pack against the relentless grinding of the Hammer City girls and the shifty play making of the Skids will be key. This is going to be a long two days, so rotating the line up to keep everyone fresh and  limiting opposing power jams by staying out of the penalty box will be keys.


A close, early win over Terminal City will give CN Power the confidence they’ll need to pull off an upset victory over the WFTDA ranked Eh! Team (giving them some much needed revenge after a tough loss in 2009); unfortunately,  I don’t think things will go as well against the powerhouse Skids on Sunday, leaving the hosts with a second place finish. But let’s hope that CN Power proves me wrong!

ROSTER (with jersey number and club teams in parantheses)

Bambi (33, Gore-Gore Rollergirls), Betty Bomber (23 Death Track Dolls), Brim Stone (21:8 Gore-Gore Rollergirls), Defecaitlin (2 Gore-Gore Rollergirls), Demolition Dawn (36 Death Track Dolls), Dolly Destructo (e^[pii] Chicks Ahoy), Dyna Hurtcha (21, Chicks Ahoy!), Hoff (65 Chicks Ahoy), Jubilee (27 Death Track Dolls), Kari Mia Beere (06 Chicks Ahoy), Lady Gag-ya (212 Gore-Gore Rollergirls), Land Shark (1/3 Death Track Dolls), Lunchbox (7-11 Gore-Gore Rollergirls), Mach Wheels (V12 Chicks Ahoy), Marvel S. Maven (22 Chicks Ahoy), Mega Mouth (26er Chicks Ahoy), Memphis Kitty (56 Smoke City Betties), Nasher the Smasher (2by4 Chicks Ahoy), Panty Hoser (99, Death Track Dolls), Rebel Rock-It (7 Chicks Ahoy).

Bambi (33, Gore-Gore Rollergirls)
Betty Bomber (Death Track Dolls)
Brim Stone (21:8 Gore-Gore Rollergirls)
Defecaitlin (7 Gore-Gore Rollergirls)
Demolition Dawn (36 Death Track Dolls)
Dolly Destructo (e^[pii] Chicks Ahoy)
Dyna Hurtcha (Chicks Ahoy!)
Hoff (65 Chicks Ahoy)
Jubilee (Death Track Dolls)
Kari Mia Beere (06 Chicks Ahoy)
Lady Gag-ya (212 Gore-Gore Rollergirls)
Landshark (Death Track Dolls)
Lunchbox (1/3 Gore-Gore Rollergirls)
Mach Wheels (V12 Chicks Ahoy)
Marvel S. Maven (22 Chicks Ahoy)
Mega Mouth (26er Chicks Ahoy)
Memphis Kitty (Smoke City Betties)
Nasher the Smasher (2by4 Chicks Ahoy)
Panty Hoser (24, Death Track Dolls)
Rebel Rock-It (7 Chicks Ahoy)

Word on the Track

Cardinal Skate Co.

The Derby Nerd can’t be about stats all the time ( at least not until the regular seasons when there actually are stats all the time…), and even though ToRD’s regular season hasn’t started yet, everyone knows that the roller derby season never really ends.


Toronto finally has its first roller derby retail outlet! Cardinal Skate Co. opened its doors this weekend in Bloor West Village, and it features the physical manifestation of the popular roller derby web shop I popped by the stylish little shop on Friday night and it was amazing to walk into a store and see a wall lined with derby skates. Stop by to show your support! Tell all your friends!


ToRD hosted its third preseason scrimmage on Saturday evening. It was another well attended and entertaining affair with only one difference: a closely contested bout between two evenly matched teams. The first 32 fans in attendance were given either a black or a white tee; twenty minutes before the bout was to begin, the fans were instructed to give the tee to the roller girl of their choice. Team Black, made up by a lot of ToRD players, quickly gelled and had doubled up Team White by the end of the first half. In the second half  White, made up of a lot of visiting skaters and ToRD rookies, finally came together and poured it on, eventually winning 101-92.

There were a lot of great showings from members of ToRD’s 2010 rookie class, and some of the skaters from sister leagues continue to put up impressive showings in these scrimmages. Thames Fatale‘s Mirambo looked great playing in only her second scrimmage since returning from a long stay on the injury reserve. Her Forest City leaguemate Killson dominated the second half from the jam line, putting up a lot of White ‘s 70 second-half points. Tri City‘s Barleigh Legal laid down some huge hits for White and was another key in the comeback.


ToRD is still playing coy about its upcoming tournament (March 27-28), but word on the track is that four travel teams will be playing a round robin tournament beginning Saturday afternoon and continuing into Sunday evening. One guarantee is that the derby will be amazing: CN Power will be hosting The Terminal City All Stars (Vancouver), Hammer City‘s Eh! Team (Hamilton), and Montreal‘s New Skids on the Block, arguably, the four best teams in the country. Considering that The New Skids and the Eh! Team are the only two WFTDA ranked teams in Canada, this tournament provides a great opportunity for CN Power to see how it stacks up against some of the best competition on the continent.

Look for a full tournament preview (including possible lineups!) early next week.


Recently, there have been a few major blowouts stateside, including  a ridiculous 409-22 Charm City victory over River City (March 14th), and an amazing 305-31 Rocky Mountain victory over Bellingham. Anyone know what the WFTDA record is for total points / margin of victory?